Tuesday Review: Knight and Day

Geoff:
So, this week’s selection was Knight and Day, the beginning of the maybe comeback for Tom Cruise, who’s spent the last few years trying to get past all the TomKat jokes and Scientology. It should be noted that for tonight, the film’s premiere in Chicagoland, the theatre was pretty much only half-full. That’s how much faith the world has in Tom Cruise these days. That, or (less likely to my mind) the preview so turned them off that they just didn’t feel like going.

I don’t know what you’d call this kind of narrative, but basically you’re following the side character instead of the person who seems like they should be the flashier main character. We’ll call it the “Rosencranz and Guildenstern Are Dead” narrative for lack of time and creativity on my part. Cameron Diaz plays June, a pretty gal who likes to restore old muscle cars from the ’70s, and in a Kansas airport she accidentally bumps in Roy Miller (Tom Cruise), which run-in turns out to not have been an accident at all. You see, Roy’s actually a secret agent with the U.S. government, and he’s been betrayed by one of his fellow agents for a little battery that can run forever (the battery’s the McGuffin, so pay it no mind), and part of his escape from Kansas (where super batteries are apparently made) involves getting the battery through security using sweet, innocent June.

Once that happens, June finds herself on the business end of a lot of explosions and gun play as Roy attempts to save her after getting her involved in the whole mess in the first place. I haven’t said it yet, but this is a comedy, and Diaz and Cruise do play well off of each other with some funny dialogue. Lines such as “I shot the first pilot, and then he shot the second pilot. It’s just one of those things,” end up getting a lot of laughs, and the movie is actually pretty fun for about it’s first three fourths.

Unfortunately the end of the film turns completely cookie-cutter with lines that’ll make your eyes roll so much they’ll wind up in the back of your head, and Roy and June fall in love, and everything ends pretty fucking lame. Until then, I was having a good time.

Susan:
I don’t know, Geoff.  I thought the whole thing was pretty damn charming.  And don’t get me wrong, I expected to hate hate hate this thing.  I mean, HATE it.  I’m using the word “hate” here, about my expectations for this movie.

But Cameron Diaz remains charming and Tom Cruise, though seemingly unaware that he is supposed to act WITH anyone else, pulls off his end pretty well too.  This flick defines the Cute Summer Date Movie genre — romance for her, action for him, and Cameron Diaz gets to shoot a few guns at the end of the movie too.  The end of the flick isn’t NOT cheesy, but it wasn’t saccharine or stomach-turning.  You might have been rolling your eyes, Geoff, but that’s probably because your heart is made of stone.

In fact, the dialogue bothered me far less than June’s inability to stay out of goddamn trouble.  Not since Kate on LOST has a character so riled me with her stupidity and unwillingness to just listen to people when they tell you NOT TO FOLLOW THEM.  Lord knows I’m all for not letting some dude tell you what to do, but when said dude is a secret agent and you are a mechanic or whatever, just listen to him for Christ’s sake.  I know this is how they moved the movie’s plot along but seriously.  So obnoxious.  I will watch people fall in love in a sappy way til the cows come home (okay, that’s actually not true, but bear with me), but don’t make me watch some stupid girl get caught up in international espionage because she wouldn’t just hang out at a swank-ass hotel in Austria for an hour or two.

Geoff:
Susan, I’m completely with you on the charming, and I wanted the end to be equally charming. I guess I just thought there were reprisals of too many lines, and when Roy asks, “What day is this?” and June says, “Someday,” well, I just let out a little sigh. I do have a fairly stony heart when it come to the movies, and I guess I don’t really know that they could have ended it any other way, but I was a grumbling old man about it nonetheless. Was there nothing more clever or charming to insert in those lines’ place?

That very little bit aside, as I already said, I had a lot of fun. You’re right that it’s annoying how much stupid shit they have June get herself into over the course of the movie. Toward the end, while trapped in a Spanish Villa by bad guys, she comes to some sort of realization that Roy WANTED and PLANNED FOR her to follow him out of the hotel in Austria, and the more I thought about it afterward, the more the logic there made no sense to me whatsoever.

But hey, you’re not meant to dissect the logic of the MacGuffin plot too much as long as there seems to be some sort of reasoning for keeping June and Roy together. The entire reality of this film is ridiculous and madcap in the first place, so expecting June to have the most realistic of sensibilities as an average citizen suddenly caught up in international espionage and intrigue might be asking too much. Although I’m with you that her actions do get really tiresome after a while.

Would I recommend this movie to other people? Sure. Would I go out of my way to do so? Probably not.

Susan:
Yes, the lack of logic in the film is actually one of its more charming attributes.  Madcap, indeed, and as much fun as it sets out to be.  A totally successful summer popcorn movie with a couple of big names and, randomly, Paul Dano.  (A side note:  I just read a pretentious article in a pretentious magazine at my pretentious barbershop yesterday about Paul Dano being the golden child of Brooklyn, and then that very night saw him playing a minor role in this giant stupid blockbuster.  Yeah, indie darling, you gotta pay the bills on that Williamsburg brownstone, dontcha?)

I also would recommend this to other people, especially people going on dates.  I don’t know about your theater, but my theater was full of couples that looked like they were about a month in — still awkward around each other but clearly excited to be together.  Movies like this are MADE for summer dating season, so grab that guy or girl you don’t really want to talk to for two hours but with whom you’d like to get busy later and head on over to the local multiplex.  The flick is at the very least more fun that a bad date.